Can yhu help my information is below, what is a good thesis state ment for this??

A topic I would choose is the health of people. I choose this topic because people need to know where it comes from, what they put into it, and the cruel ways the animals are treated. How Americans don't really pay attention to what we put in our bodies, as long as it tastes good. It’s really important to know this because there are some animals that can have diseases or be sick in any way and when they process this, you eat it and you can get really sick. Also a lot of foods have fat that doesn’t need to be there. Some of the meats can be raw, old and some can be mixed with manure by mistakes. Also these can be processed without knowing about if they were raw, old, or mixed with manure; people can eat it and get sick or maybe worse. We know that Mexico uses DDT which isn’t allowed here, yet we bring their products here and that is what we get in the grocery stores, because it’s cheaper. We have mad cow disease, spinach was bad, green onions, spices and meats and fish from China, dog food, peanut butter, chicken, flour, come on, what’s left to go? The FDA allows enough toxic stuff from US sources that are highly questionable, let alone from other countries! So I think they should start to grow their own stuff. They should purchase from organic farms.

Can yhu help my information is below, what is a good thesis state ment for this??
Appropriate thesis statement for the material as presented:


"I'm concerned about the safety of our food supply but I don't really know what I'm talking about. Here let me elaborate:"





Before you hope to write a paper that people will care about, you need to do some real research. If the first part of my sarcastic comment is the basic idea in your head (and not the smaller idea you presented about the cruelty of animal testing) then go to the Internet and gather some factual data to support your contention. Jot all those facts down on 3x5 cards and sort them out in some sort of logical flow. The decide what sort of recommendations you might like to recommend for addressing what you believe are the most important issues, and write THOSE down and organize them in some sort of logical flow. And by the time you have done all that, you should pretty much have your report. Type it up and submit it.
Reply:there is no appropriate thesis statement for this "information" because it is an unorganized mess. It reads like you just thought up some ideas and put them down on paper.


You need to take some time to write these ideas down in an organized way. Also, read your sentences out loud to another person. I am suggesting that you could use a LOT of help with your writing skills.


best of luck.

wesley